Give your colleagues a break work by wearing tights / and get your own back on your employer

Let's face it girls, in Britain today, and indeed probably everywhere else in the world, work SUCKS

You all know the score:

• Falling or frozen pay while prices rise.
• No job security - all short term contracts
• ... so no chance of career progression.
• Boring stuff to do
• Not even able to have a laugh on the job anymore.

It all makes you want to subvert the system.  But what can you do?  Super-glue the executive toilet door shut?  Wind-up IT services by bringing in your own browser and apps on a memory stick?  Spend as much of your working day on the Internet as possible

When tweeting at work it is better not to do anything else that will draw attention to yourself.  (And don't tweet in your own name or say anything to identify yourself)  

Put I got the clue to a great way to subvert work from some of the responses to this blog.

"Anyway, in response to your recent posts on Joy of Tights, a girl in tights at the office makes my workday much less productive, so I can't understand why wearing tights is preferred at the office over bare legs!"  (Anonymous comment on Tumblr)

 "Today was difficult, there was a new hot girl in the office wearing black tights, damn"(Anonymous comment on Tumblr)

"My day job is in an office, and yes, I have to admit I find women's tights a (welcome) distraction." (Cal comment on this Blog)

 So the new way of subverting work?  You guessed it; wearing tights to work.  You can distract the guys and not be blamed for it.  After all you are just looking smart, tights may even be part of your uniform

If your uniform includes a dress, wear tights rather than going bare legged.  If your uniform includes tights, up the distracting power by making your skirt that little bit shorter or by wearing higher heels or sandals to show off your feet.

You may say "what's in it for me?"  After all the guys in your office are getting the pleasure of seeing your legs in tights, what are you getting out of it.  Here is it list:

• The satisfaction of knowing your firm's work is being disrupted.
• Admiring glances from the guys in your office.  Since these guys work with you every day, they are not going to perv you up, because they have to see you tomorrow.
• Having great looking legs and being being able to explore lots of legwear fashion.
• Having another tool to help you to flirt at work.  And who knows flirting at work could lead to:

  

  A guy you like who you can spend lunch breaks with

A guy you that you fancy that can spend the evening with.....

... which might lead to fun for him and hopefully you.

Or if you are really lucky, you'll find a guy who worships you

True not all guys have a tights fetish, but lots of guys like legs.  In tights:

• Your legs will look better
• And you'll have more confidence to show them off.

So how to make your tights a more effective distraction at work.

Don't hide them under trousers

Unless you can spend a lot of time in your stocking feet

Take your shoes off
Lots of men have a foot fetish.  Here is another comment left on this blog

"I don't get the pleasure of working in offices where ladies are wearing tights (i work outdoors) but Mrs Dreyer works in an office with lots of men who she says are always perving at her legs and feet when she kicks her shoes off (most likely why her tights always end up with runs in them)" on A day in the (working) life of a tights loving perv (From John)

Even if all the guys in your office aren't into tights, a lot of them will be into feet.  You could slip your shoes all while having a break

Showing your feet off at other times may be more difficult

The boss will feel she is being too distracting

But you can always slip your shoes off under the desk or behind the counter when you are doing something else

 

And perhaps you can find to excuse to take your shoes off to fix something

"I couldn't get to the printer with my heels on"

Wear sandals
If you can't get your shoes off often, wear sandals or tease with some peep toes.

Get the whole office into tights

If you are all in tights, guys will be distracted where-ever they look

Of course the problem may be getting the rest of the girls in the office into tights.  But as more girls start wearing tights at work, the idea could catch on.

Wearing a short skirt
To help show off your tighted legs.

There are some other ways you could be in a distraction in tights

Some you can get away with...

...some you can't

Warning
Subverting your office by wearing tights won't work if there aren't lots of men in the office.

Guys you won't have the same effect if you put on a pair of tights.

See guys I have been working late into the night, just in case you haven't seen any tights at work.

A day in the (working) life of a tights loving perv

Yesterday, I had this feedback via Tumblr

"great post :) I would add a comment but I dont have any anonymous account thingy, I take back calling you lazy ! Today was difficult, there was a new hot girl in the office wearing black tights, damn."

Now this got me thinking.  Are there loads of tights fetishists out there who spend their working days perving their work colleagues legs in tights?  As THE FAT MAN (aka boyfriend) is writing an essay tonight - (he's an immature student) - I thought I'd do a bit of web research.  I came up with pics from this guy who was not only perving his colleagues tighted legs, he was also photographing them on his mobile (WTF).

So I present his images - top and tailed with what he might have seen before and after work.

Before work.....

If he saw these cuban heeled tights (stockings?) on the way to work it would start his day off on the right foot (or is that with the right feet?)

The morning 

Greet a colleague or at least her legs

What did she think he was doing under the desk?

Coffee break

Seen when he dropped his pen - yeah right

Lunch

Lunch - he finds it tastey

Afternoon

Needs to do some ... copying

In a meeting - he does not appear to be concentrating on the agenda

"Woops sorry wrong office!"

Are they talking about the way he looks at women's legs all day? No he mustn't be paranoid, there is nothing abnormal about watching your workmates through a cupboard.

Says good bye to colleagues as he leaves (not usually done from under a desk).

Going home
All that time perving but no stocking feet, not even shoe play.  Then on the way home a girl on the train has no take her boots off to rest her feet

Our hero goes who happy.  He will have a lot of think about this weekend.  Perhaps he'll spend the morning in bed.

How men get addicted to tights etc part 2

Yesterday I suggested that a guys get a strong tights fetish because of association formed between women they were attracted to and the tights the women wore.  A bit like Pavlov's dog.

Bell + food -> salivate

leads to

Bell -> salivate

Except for tights we might crudely express the relationship

Woman + tights -> hard on

leads to

Tights (on legs) -> hard on

Now he doesn't need even the whole woman - just her legs to give the tights shape.

Of course tights usually come with a girl attached so the

tights -> erection

link is strengthened.  The guy may even get

tights (on their own) -> erection

Does this picture turn you on? Oh dear

Now I don't mean to suggest that women set out to give men a tights fetish.  It is sort of an accident.

These girls probably just took their shoes off because their feet were hot (meaning too warm, not that they thought their feet were sexy!).  If any guys form the association between sexy and tights it is an accident.  As Cal pointed out in a recent comment (thanks Cal) most women don't realize guys find tights sexy.  Joy of Tights is unusual because I've had 3 boyfriends (that word dates me), with a tights fetish.

 I doubt even these girls were out to set up a tights fetish.  They just wanted to turn the guy on.

I had promised to list the ways a guy might acquire a tights fetish in later life, but I'm already late for work - so that will have to wait for tomorrow.  This blogging is going to loose me my job.  Yes I am wearing tan tights (Boots 15 den X large), no this picture of ladies at work in tights does not include me.

Did you pull a sickie yesterday?

More people were expected to take a day off yesterday than any other time of the year. (Well according to Daybreak on ITV).  Did you make it into work yesterday in a cosy pair of opaques to keep you warm?

Or did you put on a nice pair of fishnets and sexy sandals to try and beat the depression of being at work?

Did you and your trusty tights.... brave the tube

and get into work to find all the other lazy cows were pulling a sickie

Or did you....?

Get rat arsed Sunday night so you couldn't get in Monday.

Or perhaps you felt ill so that you to stay in bed....

.....with a friend

Or perhaps you got up and couldn't decide what to wear

Or you got up, got your knickers and tights on

..... and couldn't be fucking arsed any more

Perhaps you have a new girlfriend you cannot bear to leave

Nothing like a good snog in tights

Perhaps you had a good book to finish.  Its just soooo decadent reading naked or nearly naked

I'm reading "Intimate adventures of an office girl " by Sienna Lewis.

Or perhaps you spend all day surfing the net looking for pictures to illustrate your blog post about not going to work!

Just so many reasons not to go to work!