Friday, 15 March 2013

Red Nose Day or Red Hose Day

Today is the day in the UK where everyone puts on a stupid red nose to collect money for charity.  Which usually means a children's charity.  I have nothing against young animals, just not young human animals.  It is a bit late for this year, but next year rather than wearing a stupid red nose wear some red hose.
Going to work on red hose day
Now if you really want to raise money for charity here are some suggestions that involve red hose rather than a red nose.

1. Get sponsored to wear red hose for the day.
Sponsor her tights.....
..not red enough? .. sponsor her tights instead
At least you get to look good while raising money.

2. Auction a pair of your red tights for charity
Now you have to do this right.  The biggest payers will be perverts.  So don't auction a clean pair.  Auction a pair you have been wearing for the whole of red hose day.

3. Do a photo-shoot in your red tights and give the proceeds to charity

4. Do a sponsored walk in red tights
This is a lot harder than just being sponsored for wearing red tights, so is probably best avoided.
Given up already?
5. Get sponsored for doing something you enjoy in red tights
No, not that.  How about dancing?
Who let the blue tights in?
Oh well, the more the merrier
6. Run a competition to guess the number of ladders you get in your tights during red hose day
No, on second thoughts, not sure this will work.

7. Get sponsored to do something dangerous in your tights
Like climbing onto a roof in the dark, in your red tights and .....
..then standing up on the roof in your red tights feet
Don't try this at home
8. Being sponsored for wearing nothing but red tights
I think the key word was nothing, phew that panel is handily placed
OK nothing but red tights and gloves and beads and (oh all right then) sub-glasses
9. Holding a red tights party that people have to pay to attend

10. Charging people at work a penalty for not wearing red tights
Naughty, naughty your fishnets aren't red
13. Sell your soul to Satan for charity
If you haven't got a soul Satan will take your body.
All tied up and ready for Satan to collect, He's going to have fun
What's this got to do with red tights?  Well Satan might turn up in a pair.  But he probably won't

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