Cheerleaders

Readers of Sunday's post may have been upset that I talked about football without mentioning cheerleaders.  Of course I was talking about soccer rather than American football which tends not to have cheerleaders in the same way.  Nevertheless, time for some cheerleader pics.

I think cheer leaders wearing pantyhose is cool.  Why?  Short answer men are very simple creatures.  OK longer answer.  Men learn just like Pavlov's dog.

• Man sees sexy cheer leader in pantyhose.
• Man's small brain associates "pantyhose" with "sexy"
• Man sees another girl in pantyhose and his feels in his cock "sexy" because of the association he made before.

So those of us who are less stunning or wearing more clothes are still seen as sexy because of the way the guy's neurons wired up.

The same applies to Hooter's girls.....

Thank them for helping you to look sexy in your tan tights

So don't despise those bunnies, girls.  They are helping you look sexy.

Of course unlike Hooters girls, cheer leaders wear real tights - that's tights with feet.

Now it is perfectly understandable that Hooters girls wear footless tights.  They are in tights for a long shift and their feet would get so smelly.  (OK I know that turns some of you guys on - but its not good for their foot health).  Cheerleaders are not in tights for so long, so can get away with the footed variety.

I wouldn't like those guys with a foot fetish to think none of the rest of us wear tights with feet.  I need all the help I can get getting a man, even if it involves covering my feet in nylon

And thanks also to girl marching band and all those other girls helping men to associate tights with sexy.

Porn again
Of course since men find cheerleaders so sexy often soft porn shots often use cheer leader consumes (as they use Hooters uniforms).  But even porn can wire men's brains to make us look sexy in tights.

Genuine cheerleader posing for a naughty shot

Now guys what are you wanking over?  Looking at their feet or somewhere else?

Hooter's Girl tied up at work - notice she is in tights with feet

Even my tights heroine Sweet keeps up the Hooter's Girls in footed tights myth

Do(o) Little in Tights

Joy of Tights latest tights heroine is Eliza Doolittle who is reported by yesterday's London Evening Standard as being out wearing just a pair sheer of sheer tights and a sweatshirt.  Not quite - she is wearing sandals too.  What tights with sandals?  Go for it Eliza.  Even better the tights are reinforced toe (I think) - if you look carefully.

(For those of you who don't know. Eliza Sophie Caird (born 15 April 1988), better known by her stage name Eliza Doolittle, is an English singer-songwriter who signed to the Parlophone record label in October 2008. Her debut self-titled album, Eliza Doolittle was released on 12 July 2010, where it debuted at number 3 in the UK. Since the album's release, Doolittle has spawned two top 25 hits, including "Skinny Genes" and "Pack Up", which debuted within the top 5 on the UK Singles Chart.).

Well this got Joy of Tights interested.  Is Eliza often found in tights?

Well on her blog she talks about seeing amazing YSL shoes - a girl after my own heart - and then about a shop with a loraloralot of tights.

And in another post she talks of laddering her fav tights.

She says of these tights:

"They’re the ones on the cover of my EP with little hearts on…I have bought about 10 pairs over all cos they ladder nearly every time I wear them…check me last night at the pop up store event in Whiteleys they must have laddered just before I got there ! ARRGGHH !"

Holes and ladders seem to be a fact of Eliza's tights.  (Well they are for us all - but her's get noticed).  The Daily Mail said

"British singer Eliza Doolittle was not quite the 'Fair Lady' [Ho, Ho, Ho such a good joke  (NOT) - Joy of Tights] as she stepped out in Los Angeles on Tuesday.The 24-year-old star was spotted walking around in a pair of holey tights - and very tiny shorts.Eliza was seen heading out for an early-morning coffee, sporting a very grungy outfit consisting of and oversized jacket, shorts and trainers."

At least a Eliza has a sense of humour tweeting this pic saying she had ladders in her tights

If I'm not mistaken I think they are PP Henry Holland

Tights do seem to figure in Eliza bio, another site says:

"Eliza Doolittle – strong of opinion, smiley of face, loud of tights – was born in Camden, north London 24 years ago. She’s been writing songs since she was 12 and signed a publishing deal at 16. As she matured, her songs began to flower into the magical blooms they are today – gorgeous pop songs which mine sounds from the 60’s and 70’s while managing to sound indisputably fresh."

Very loud tights @ SpongeBob FancyPants Charity Auction

And as a final piece of evidence check this quote out from the MyTights.com referring to a Sunday Express article

"Eliza Doolittle, famous for hit singles such as Skinny Genes and Pack Up, revealed her fashion address book secret to The Sunday Express’ S magazine – and her best kept secret is MyTights.com! It should come to no surprise that the brilliantly poppy singer-songwriter is a huge fan of all things funky, fun and bright when it comes to fashion and that includes her choice of tights. Eliza’s chosen autumn/winter wear is a jumper teamed with ‘funky tights’ and pointed to mytights.com for all her hosiery needs, “MyTights.com stocks the most amazing tights. I get all mine from there.” "

Bet these were from MyTights.com @ Lacoste VIP Lounge at the ATP World Tour Finals

Don't know if these were from MyTights.com but pretty damn sexy  @ ELLE Style Awards in London

Love the shoes, nice to see the tights without the trainers

 OK just a fell more pics

Out and about

@ This Morning TV Program in London

What more holes?

Outside Radio 1

Tights and other assets

So are you going to imitate Eliza's style?

With holes in your tights?

Call that a hole? Can hardly see it!

With socks and tights?

No, you got this wrong guys!  Can't see Eliza going for white socks and tan tights!

The latest - Tights and sandals - maybe with RHT?

What kind of man are you?

A leg man, you likes girls legs or

A foot man, who likes feet or

A tits man who likes tits or

An arse man who likes arses or

A brain man who likes girls with intelligence and personality

Whatever kind of man you are, take my latest poll - top right of this page - and leave me a comment as to why you are the type of man you are.

No, minister

A Tory MP has come under fire  for saying that women are putting themselves at risk of rape by wearing short skirts and high heels.  (OK he's not actually a minister and is hopefully will never become one, but it makes a better post title).  Richard Graham’s comments sparked outrage among women’s groups, who insist that if a woman becomes a victim of rape it is not because of her dress style.  Mr Graham, who in the past likened a night out in his constituency city of Gloucester to ‘decadent Rome’, said: ‘A night out is about having fun without putting yourself at risk.  If you are a young woman on her own trying to walk back home through a park early in the morning in a tight, short skirt and high shoes, and there’s a predator  .  .  .  if you are blind drunk wearing those clothes how able are you to get away?'

In danger? Short skirt.

In danger? Heels too high

In danger? Drunk

Mr Graham further said ‘It’s not about the impact of your clothes on a potential predator in my view – it’s about whether the clothes you’re wearing make it harder to get away from a predator.’

Perhaps shorts are better than skirts because you can run faster in them.  Perhaps you should go about in your stocking feet all night just in case you need to make a quick get away

Safer in shorts

Safer with your shoes off

Joy of tights could recommend that you always go out in tights so you your feet have some protection if you have to take your shoes off and  leg it.

Yes, a silly picture to go with a silly idea

And you should always stick with (a female) mate or two.

Now stick together when you go out girls

And there are handy self defence courses.

If in doubt go for the balls, but they may not always be this accessible

But this isn't point

If a girl wants to go out in heels and a short skirt - and even have a bit to drink - why shouldn't she?

Here is the point for guys of small brain

• There is nothing wrong with looking, indeed this blog is all about appreciating the joy of looking at girls in tights.  
• But don't touch unless you are sure she wants you to
• If millions of years of evolutionary history and the throbbing in your cock makes you mis-interpret the signals - remember No means NO.  NO got it?
• Look if you've got it that bad but she's not interested, go and have a wank thinking about her at home.

She doesn't look that interested

I think she probably is interested

Fuck off, means FUCK OFF

But what if men won't behave, then they should have their balls cut off

Pulling it out for the nice man with his chopper

That will stop the testosterone flowing.

Or if there higher brain centers cannot control the instincts of their primitive reptilian brain, then their brain should be boiled in the electric chair.

From the "Green Mile" - but it is no nicer today

 Also, if the UK had sensible gun laws like the US of A, girls could defend themselves.

Posed by model

Knowing the girl you are thinking of stalking might have a gun and blow your balls off, might put you off the whole idea.  Not so clever being a predator now is it?

Not posed by a model, she could blow your balls off