Fear of shoe loss destroys Zen like calm

Yesterday lunchtime, as I often do, I went to meditation .......

Not very good posture girls

That's better - wish I could still do that position!

.... to relieve the stress of work.

I said TO RELIEVE THE STRESS OF WORK.

That's more like it - reading up before a meeting - always stressful.  Nice shoes BTW.

But as many experienced meditators will know you, you are often required to take your shoes off and put them in another room.

Now while I have nothing against this in principle, in fact I think you should take your shoes off and go in your stocking feet in reverence to a higher power.  Something churches would do well to learn.

Do like Moses girls and take your shoes off in front of the LORD.  (BTW don't you just hate flats!)

But I have a fear they may be stolen and I have to walk home in my stocking feet.  (PLUS some bitch gets a good pair of MY shoes free).  It's one thing walking in your stocking feet for comfort when you have your shoes with you.

Another to have to march home unshod and get holes in your tights.  (Bet you thought I was never going to mention the magic word that makes my male readers come over all a quiver).  Is there an official name for the phobia of losing one's shoes?  I haven't found it yet but I didn't Google very hard.

And another thing about meditation is the danger of flashing your knickers to guys.  OK it some other situations this may be unavoidable

(like when drunk)

But do you want to disturb the men in their meditation?  (Poor dears)

So I compose this Haiku

So close to enligtenment
Then panties seen
Back to prison
How sad!

Note to self - wear trousers to meditate

No need to cross her legs - modesty preserved

Thought: Perhaps chilling in park is safer than meditation

At least you know where your shoes are!