Joy of Tights Guide to Keeping Warm.

With more snow coming to the UK here is my advice.

(1) Wear thicker tights outdoors

These need not be plain opaques but could be pattered:

or even sparkly

(2) Don't go outside in sheer tights

(3) Wear sheer tights indoors.  Keeping your thick woolly tights on inside will cause you to overheat and you won't feel the benefit when you go outside.  What's more with your legs snug in sheers you won't need to turn up the heating so high.

Hope her muff isn't cold without panties

And rubbing your tights against a friend's can generate lots of heat

So hot they could burst into flames and leave behind six piles and ash and a charred carpet?

(4) Wear socks over your tights.  I hate to say this but they will keep your feet warm.

They could even be long socks....

Which girl is hottest?

All that nylon friction will generate heat

(5) Light a real fire  Psychologically it makes you feel warmer too.

Get a neighbour or friend to spontaneously combust to reduce fuel costs

(6) Have a party and dance.  Invite the neighbours round , more bodies and movement means more heat.  And of course all that alcohol will warm you up

Those girls must be cold with bare legs

(7) Find a man to cuddle

or a girl if you prefer

Start with a good snog and then work up to full sex to generate extra heat

Will he be hot enough for both of you girls?