Thursday 31 December 2015

The single girl's guide to new year sex

"The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears." W H Auden
Whilst Joy of Tights has the greatest respect for the professionalism of sex workers, doing those things, (and those men), that none of the rest of us want, I don't think this is an option for the single girl.
Spending New Year Eve with your BFFs is attractive.  Dressing up, and hosing up, just for each other.
But it would be a pity not to have any New Year's Eve Sex, and there could be enough men to go around.  The ancient Roman festival of Saturnalia which gave rise to Christmas and New Year featured
"Debauchery A time of wine, women, song, and letting loose your sexual impulses."
See a New Year Shag is traditional!  And don't forget that In Roman times, Bacchus, the god of wine, became the lord of these festivals.
Drink plenty in honour of Bacchus
Back to sex
Happiness is three boys and three girls
But what if you are having the compete for cock?
Since this is Joy of Tights, I would recommend making the most of your pantyhosed legs and feet.
Starting Pantyhosed Stimulation
And you could drop your standards - alcohol will help here
Maybe not lower your standards this much
Alternatively you can follow the spirit of Bacchus, share the guys with other girls and have an orgy.
Remember that an orgy is not just great sex, it is a spiritual experience.
"The word "orgy" comes from the Greek word "orgia" meaning "secret worship". Since most secret worship involved sexual rituals, and Christians were opposed to anything sexual the word orgy came to have the .... meaning it has today, .....
Many words that are used to describe extreme religious fervour are also used to describe great sex, such as passion, bliss, and ecstasy. There were many orgies throughout the year as celebrations in the religion of the Goddess."
Share and share alike - its your spiritual duty
Three may not be a crowd
And if the guy is no good, hey you can always play with the other girls (If this doesn't get the guy going again nothing will )
Make sure you all get a share
It may be better not to have some men all to yourself
The police will be needed to ensure they all get a share of him.  Oh they are the police
A few months later.  The Life force was really flowing through him. 
Bacchus would have been proud of his efforts
 But what if there aren't enough girls for all the guys?  Shame.
Two happy boys, later they'll be dipping their wicks with their balls deep to make babies.  Their girls will soon be knocked up. Two unhappy boys will just have to wank off listening to the other two
Perhaps you can help those leftover guys out by letting them both (all) pleasure you.
But what would Jesus say?  See top of picture
If multiple men were good enough for the Goddess Draupadi they are good enough fro you

Think of the advantages of taking multiple men:
  • The power.  They will be so, so,  so ....so grateful
  • When one has shot his load the other could still keep going
  • Being pleasured in so many ways at once
  • They will compete in pleasing you
Not the way to do it - she's not making the most of the available resources
Sharing the load
A few months later - the effect of all that New Year Sperm.  Which guys sperm was fittest to get the job done?  New Year is a time of new Life.
But perhaps you have had enough of guys and the unwanted gifts they leave behind growing inside you, draining your body and resources all so that they can pass on their genes. At Saturnalia:
"In Roman times, Bacchus, the god of wine, became the lord of these festivals. During the Bacchanalian festivals the everyday rules were turned topsy-turvy. The masters waited on the servants. All sexual prohibitions were lifted. "
What a good time to love your inner (or outer) Lesbian
 Continuing our Roman New Year theme
"During the Roman Imperial era, sources for same-sex relations among women are ... abundant, in the form of love spells, medical writing, texts on astrology and the interpretation of dreams, and other sources.  A graffito from Pompeii expresses the desire of one woman for another:  ' I wish I could hold to my neck and embrace the little arms, and bear kisses on the tender lips. Go on, doll, and trust your joys to the winds; believe me, light is the nature of men.'"
Think of all the fun you could have
Tit touching
Leg Loving.  Her Hose Your Hand
Sensuous Snogging
Terrific Touching.  Just wait 'till the tights come off
Happy New Year
Sources
Saturnalia
Roman Lesbianism

Wednesday 30 December 2015

Welcome to the Working Week

Missing your daily Joy of Tights update?
We were wondering where it had gone.

Well some of us had to go back to work on Tuesday, but I am trying to update more regularly whilst I am working.
Some of us have to go to work
Anything we can do to help?

I didn't think you gave a shit.  I thought you were just here for a glimpse of nylon tights to wank off too.

No really, we'd like to help.

Well here are some suggestions
  • How about a bit of feedback?  A girl likes to be complemented.  Actually even abuse.  No publicity is bad publicity.  Maybe.
  • Suggestions for topics - please leave under the posts
  • Suggestions for picture sources.  I can spend ages looking for the right pic.  Thanks to The Fat Man for use of his porn collection, but it's not all appropriate.
Sounds too much like hard work.  You are right, I don't give a shit.  Just having a pre-work wank over the pics you have posted.  Ahhh that's better.  Those nyloned toes get the sperm spurting.

Too much information.  But at least you are going to work.  
And I bet you'll be wanking off over any girls who are hosed up in the office
 Unlike those lucky cows who are school teachers.  Work 9 to 3 and long holidays.
Interesting thought, are boys who see there teachers in tights more likely to develop a tights fetish.  If teacher wears sandals or going stocking foot does the boy grow up perving nyloned stocking feet?  I feel a poll coming on.
Love your tights miss

Monday 28 December 2015

Shoeonomics

Feel that you need more shoes?
Shoe collection a little flat?
Then you must go and look at shoes
Try shoes

And of most important, buy shoes!

Why? So that you can get so excited in the shoe shop that you lift your top?
So that you can enjoy trying the new shoes out at home?
All that of course!

But because the money you spend will help shoe shop employees and owners buy
Bras
and cars
(Buying shoes is your duty to your country's economy.)  Your spending will allow them to have life's little luxuries like
Holidays
A new PC
Beauty Treatment
Jewellery
And of course life's essentials
The occasional hair cut
A trip to work on the bus
Oh yes and food to eat
And your money goes on and on. Once the shoe shop owner has bought a new car, then the car company can employ girls to stand around - (the company's cars) - looking sexy.
And then those girls take their pay - (which was originally the money spent by the shoe shop owner on the car, which before that the money that you and others paid for shoes) - can buy clothes
I assume she has clothes to try on in the changing room
 and tights
So keeping the older of a old fashion underwear shop in business (and in tights)
It's called the multiplier; each Pound (Dollar or Euro) you spend on a pair of shoes gets passed on and spent again (and again).

That's just the retail staff.  Your spending on shoes also supports the Elves who make the shoes
OK. I know Elves don't really make shoes.  Although this pair could have an Evil Elvin Original
The Evil Elvin influence of shoes like these could make you do anything
Like showing your pantyhosed arse to the world
You could take the shoes off to avoid the Evil Elf Influence
But the Elves may not take kindly to you taking their shoes off...
... and next time you might not be able to get the Elf Shoes off
More Elf shoes?
But back in the real world (or is the world with the Elves real?), buying shoes can only do good can't it?  All that money that flows to all those people?  Who can object?  The Pope.
Actually not this Pope but I really like the image so I thought I'd use it
"Pope Francis has warned the world's 1.2 billion Roman Catholics not to be "intoxicated" by possessions in his annual Christmas homily. He called for more sobriety in a world obsessed by "consumerism and hedonism, wealth and extravagance"."
First it was burning heretics, soon it will be burning shoes.
At least the girl got taken out of the shoes; but perhaps she's burning separately
Ahhh yes so she is
IMHO the Church needs to reconsider its fashion sense.  Here's suggestion for a new nun's uniform
Note the shoes